Chapter 3: Orientation

After reading chapter 3 it came to my attention that I tend to use an orientation not of my liking, the self-centered orientation. While I was reading I kept telling myself this couldn't be me, but looking back at my past conflicts this has been what I leaned towards more. Now that I am older though, the relationship-centered orientation has come up here and there in conflicts I have been in, especially with my girlfriend. What stands out to me after pondering on my past conflicts, and it's sad to say, but the self-centered orientation has probably left me with a more satisfied outcome. When I do use this method it always seems that my way is the best way. I know it sounds harsh but this is what crosses my mind (in no way am I saying my way is what’s right though). This is not an orientation a favor but I do feel it is sometimes needed. For example, when I work with a group and the members are shy and we need to get something done.  Or when a deadline needs to be met and no one is making an effort in trying to meet that deadline.  So in these cases I do think this orientation is needed, I may be wrong, but I do feel it works sometimes. Other than situations like this, I feel and want to use the relationship-orientation more when it comes to conflicts I face on a daily basis. Not only do I feel this is the best way to solve a conflict, I feel it is a way where both parties can get both of their needs equally satisfied.